Be still and know

Opening my eyes this morning brought a realization of what today was... what it was supposed to be... and the pain and disappointment began looming before me. I reached my heart out to embrace it feeling that if I could face it head on now that perhaps I could overcome it later on in the day. But before I could do that I heard a voice speak deep within my Spirit... "Happy Anniversary" He said with a smile. It was the voice of my Beloved. I did not share His enthusiasm for this of all mornings, but knowing Him, I let my heart listen. "I am celebrating," He continued... "Ten years of love and faithfulness poured out before me." I must admit that this came as an unexpected response... I have been feeling that the last ten years were a "good try, Honey... but you missed it" or "well, that was almost it... try try again <wink>" maybe a "what doesn't kill you will make you stronger" But celebrating? Wow. Our thoughts are truly NOT His thoughts. And I am so humbled and relieved by His view of my life.

So in this spirit I am celebrating as well today. I am celebrating a decade of my life that I have brought before my King. Days and days and days of love and faithfulness poured over His feet. Just as there are seasons in the natural, there are seasons of life. And although I am mourning the sweetness of spring and the glory of summer, I do embrace the season of Autumn that I am in. I can see my leaves are dying and falling all around me, but I believe there is a reason that in the natural God caused these dying pilgrims to carry the brilliant, fiery colors that they do. They do not present hues of death and destruction but of strength and boldness and beauty.
My dear friend and mentor said, " Fall is when stuff dies... There is beauty in death but it only lasts for a little while. What we don't see is that all that death is preparation for the life that follows after a barren winter in the spring. The soil is enriched. Room is made for new growth and fruitfulness. Life goes on. (It always does)." And its true. 
Joseph was stripped of his coat of many colors, tossed into a pit, and betrayed by those he loved. But God used the unkindness of others and maneuvered him into a place of favor. Because of God's faithfulness and (I believe) Joseph's willingness to be used in the hand of the Lord, He was placed into position for his ultimate destiny to unfold, for God purposed for him to feed a nation. I'm sure that there were many times in his life he would have felt his future was uncertain, and so many times he was wronged or misjudged. God sees. God hears. God knows.
So as the air is turning cold in my life and I can feel the long winter months are coming, as my tree is shifting and uncertain, as my coat of many colors is falling to the ground piece by piece and I see barren branches in its place... my heart will look up...
and I will see celebration spread across My Father's face as He breathes in the aroma of this perfume.  This is the truth that I cling to, this is why I can look with joy on today and hold hope for tomorrow.

A design idea

This fun and EASY project will add order to your cluttered craft area or  (if you're like most of us moms with boys) just make throwing some coloring in for art and expression feasible. I had this idea a while back to use baby wipe boxes for storing art/craft supplies. They look so cute in a row on the shelf and it makes craft time and clean up easier.

I started buying wipes in different colored plastic boxes and using them for various things - they are the perfect size for markers, popsicle sticks, paint brushes, crayons, etc.(even loose stickers since they are deep enough to rummage through without dumping all of the stickers out... not that it stops my kids from dumping them all over the floor :)  )

Then I simply wrote the name of the contents on the side with permanent markers in fun fonts... kids like the feeling of being self sufficient and getting their own things from the closet and sorting to clean up is a good tool for early math skills as well.

This picture is of my sister's closet... her girls use it all the time... my art closet on the other hand is STILL a mess ;) and has a lock on it since my boys have abused marker privaleges all over my walls, table, carpet... etc. but hey, without the boxes I would've given up on art for them a long time ago all together!!

Enjoy


 

Diadem

Waking with the sunrise sounds so romantic. It wasn't until recently in my life that I realized that it truly depends on the circumstances of the night before. For example... having twins with colds who wake up throughout the night and are not able to sleep until they are in bed with you while you are also trying to nurse a baby who you are constantly aware may fall out of the bed at any given moment (or at the very least be covered in cold germs) because the bed you are trying to comfort everyone in happens to be a twin size.  Finally the baby, after nursing, not falling(because you were holding him and not actually sleeping), burping, and puking on all the sheets has decided to wake for the day and wants to play with you. Giving up on any night time rest and throwing all your hope into the possibility of a nap later, you welcome the day (because it REALLY will come whether you like it or not) and your children who need you and greet the sunrise with an attempt to separate it from all the negative feelings of "I'm not ready for this" and enjoy the colors shining through the clouds or something simple about your life. I know that there will be a day when I will be old and wrinkly and my children will be grown and living their own lives. I will have many sunrises and sunsets to enjoy throughout my life and I will have ample time to enjoy them, so I'm determined to not let the way my day starts now or the way my night was affect my goodmorning smiles and kisses. I want to embrace my children and the new day. I want to throw myself into the small moments that make up a life - come what may. And as I've been sitting here for literally 7 minutes and have been interrupted more than 10 times-"shooing" children out repeatedly so that I can have a few Mommy moments to myself- I'm grabbing on to patience with all my might and choosing to embrace my life, and love even when circumstances don't make it easy... that's when the choice becomes Glorious. Rise up Glorious Women of God and receive your gems forged in secret, one day you will wear a crown in which they will be displayed openly and know that God revels in the loveliness of your heart every day when no one sees.

My Cocoon

As we transform in our lives from Glory to Glory we have times of hiding and of pain. We feed ourselves on life, we wrap ourselves in fine white silken threads and we give ourselves over to the process that must take place. We hide, we wait, we trust. We trust that one day we will sense the timing of the Lord and push through our burial garments into the freshness of a new day. We will hang on to our cocoon only long enough to let our wings dry before releasing the things of the past and taking flight. I have purposed in my heart to allow myself to be hidden... swallowed up in a safe but confined realm of not seeing, not hearing... but trusting. I have purposed to emerge triumphant in my own right... using the gifts and techniques that God has predestined in my spiritual DNA using the support of the environment around me, but the tenacity to get myself out... so that I will not end my process beautiful albeit lame as a butterfly released by man unable to form the strength needed to survive the world beyond... I will pursue strength and push into the fullness of what God envisioned when he called my name... I will fly in wholeness and beauty and freedom.

Fall is coming...

The baby awoke earlier than normal today, an entire hour early, which would usually start the day off on the wrong foot; however he was so full of tender smiles, precious snuggles, and all around joyful expressions that I couldn't help but be enraptured by his little self and be transported from my warm bed into the world beyond without being cross. I've taken notice that the trees beyond the yard are beginning to shed their summer ware for fall fashion. Now I sit at my kitchen table next to a large vase of zinnias and a white, square plate that holds the best Bartlett pears I have ever eaten thanks to the local farmers market. They are soft and ripe and sweet and all that a pear should be; my blueberry bagel slathered with butter tries to compete but is unable to and so it  waits for my coffee to brew hoping to improve its chances of desirability once it has a partner on its side. Oh yes, that's right. I have started drinking coffee. It would be no large thing to announce except for the fact that I have probably had two half cups of coffee in my entire life. In all honesty it is still mostly flavored creamer, but I love the warm aroma and the nostalgia that it brings. Thoughts of a simpler time flood my memory as I hold my cup... early mornings in the middle of the woods. The leaves... startling shades of orange and salmon, deep passionate reds and purples, bright yellows, and crunchy browns heralding the onset of a frost. The air chilled and crisp making your heart beat faster and your mind alert with the possibilities of the day. Oh how I love it! I woke before the sun rose on my own accord and would clean out the cast iron wood stove. Starting a fire and watching to make sure it caught would fill the next few moments before I would hear two groggy voices call over the upstairs landing... COFFFFEEEEEEEEEEE. Like two zombies, probably roused by the clanking around the wood stove, their voices would rise in hopes of being satisfied without leaving their bed.  I started a pot while I prepared my breakfast and once it was ready I poured the magical liquid into two cups and tried to carry them up the stairs to my parents bedroom without spilling-which hardly ever happened-and upon receiving their cups the spell was broken and their day commenced. It's amazing stuff. Maybe I'm just looking for my day to start... maybe I'm just trying to commence these first days of a new life... maybe I'm just trying to get in touch with a simpler time... but I wonder, does it really matter why when it tastes so good?

I'm blogging...

I have never blogged... this is my first attempt to reach out across cyber space and share a piece of myself with all or none of you... I'm reaching because I need to stretch these tired arms, I'm looking because I'm seeing more than I have ever seen before, I'm understanding something new, something wonderful, and something that frightens me and I am a social creature who thrives on verbal processing. I am also wearing my very first pair of reading glasses and I feel very proud and scholarly... perhaps once I picked up my glasses and looked at myself for the first time I subconsciously decided that I truly ought to have a blog...I now embody what I thought a "blogger" should look like. So here we are, by hook or by crook, I hope that something I write someday will stir thoughts or hearts or creativity... I hope that I will cause you to laugh or cry or move you in some small way because even though we may not even know each other we are connected. I am in your living room sharing a cup of herbal tea with you sitting on the end of your couch.... just like that. Ahh the wonders of the internet.